okay.. that doesn't really sound like me.. starting with 'hey!' I mean. That tends to be my conversation starter with people i'm not so familiar with, so... i'll try and stick to the title and be honest and try to convey myself to you as best possible.
So.. my name ? Well, we will keep that a mystery for now - I'm not sure how personal I want this blog to get yet, so i'll keep my options open..
Okay, so if not my name, then what? Well.. I'll tell you a little about myself.
I'm 20 and I'm a student. Cool. Informative, well done girl! lols. <--- I say that ALOT. It's quite a bad habit lols - see. I use lols as a filler in conversations even.
grrrr okok I'm blabbing I know..this is irritating - i'll get to it.
So I'd like to say i'm just your ordinary average girl, but there are times where I wonder whether I am or not. Wow. This blogging thing is kinda hard - I mean there's all these thoughts you want to express lol, but when it comes to it its so difficult to get it all out without blabbing. I guess thats kind of a way to explain myself to you - I'm a girl of so many different thoughts and interests, and i'm a little lost you could say. I'm trying to figure myself out - maybe that's why I'm struggling to explain myself to you. I'm trying to find my passion, my interest, my love (not romantically lol). I feel like there are so many influences day to day, especially since we live in a time of social media. I mean instagram and youtube bring out my love of fashion and make me want to pursue it as I see others doing it..but then I wonder if I have the same passion as these other girls. Then there are the more poetic and philosophical elements of my personality that wish to fulfill much more and almost mock me for wanting to do the previously mentioned. That little voice in my head tells me that it's not me, and I seem to agree. I feel like my true talent/passion (if I actually do have one - i'm still trying to figure it out) is a love of life, of humanity, and the world. I like to analyze people, to understand them and to empathize with them. I appreciate nature and beauty.
Honestly.. I'm lost.. I'm a girl with so many thoughts and hopes.. yet sometimes I feel very alone, almost as if I don't fit in. I feel like I'm awkward, I can be shy and that I'm often lacking with words. I mean I have plenty to say..it's just I never know how to..
So I seek refuge in this blog, and you (my possible readers...if there will ever be any haha)
I guess this is just a place for me to organize my thoughts, or even just let them out to give them some sort of meaning and recognition. I really just want to express myself and to find myself and my passion God willing.
I know this first post is a little crazy and disorganized.. I just wanted to blurt something out to push myself to actually start. So yeah.. sorry about that.
I'll work on it :).
T x
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